Signs You’re Carrying Relationship Baggage And How To Fix It

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Leave the pity party behind and move on! As opposed to rushing into another one then you break up in another year or so, says Lilian. Thanks to her unparalleled expertise, she has been successful in helping a number of patients bounce back to normalcy after experiencing a prolonged period of depression.

So ask yourself: what have you been keeping from him, and why? Moving on is equally painful for both sexes because of emotional investments made in the relationship. Is moving on easier for either gender?

Luggage & Baggage Cartoons

Dating and air travel have at least one thing in common: It's rare to see anyone arrive baggage-free. In fact, nearly seven out of 10 people think their partner brings issues into a relationship, a study in Human Communication reports. Use these tips to handle her baggage with care—and keep it from crushing you. Her Ex Is a Borderline Stalker THREAT LEVEL: 5 out of 10 Ask Yourself Is this chump really such a big deal? Exes usually lurk on social media because they can't do it in person, says Brandy Engler, Ph. So don't go postal over a post. Consider This If she's truly moved on, she'll be allergic to nostalgia, Engler says. Look for signs she's dwelling on the past—texting him, meeting him for coffee, accepting his calls. If they turn up, break away. Handle It Just bite your tongue—for now. You may feel tempted to call her out or confront the guy, but opt for a quieter power move: Fill her calendar with adventures. Relationships thrive on novelty, Engler says, and planning activities provides you with a strategic advantage. There's a fine line between direct and accusatory. Cross it, and you'll only appear insecure and threatened, says Engler. That's how exes win. She's a Beauty but Thinks She's a Beast THREAT LEVEL: 5 out of 10 Ask Yourself How serious is it? Sadly, this is common: Up to 90 percent of women are dissatisfied with their appearance, says Paulette Kouffman-Sherman, Psy. Long term, that could threaten everything from your sex life to your emotional health, she says. Consider This Are her girlfriends also this hard on themselves? The journal Sex Roles found that the way a woman thinks about her body is strongly influenced by her friends' feelings about their bodies. Handle It Go ahead: Lay it on thick. Tell her how much you love the dimple on her ass and the freckle on her back, says Robyn Silverman, Ph. Avoid staring at potential danger zones, like her stomach. Your thoughtful praise can help her beat back her insecurity and shout down that relentless inner critic. Wrong Move Comparing her to other people—even if it's meant to be positive, Silverman says. With genital herpes, that's when the risk of transmission is greatest, according to Peter Leone, M. The good news: That risk tends to diminish over time. Consider This Genital herpes is more common than you think, says Dr. Leone; it affects roughly one in six people. But hey, she got tested and was honest with you, Engler says. Also, if she pops a suppressive drug, such as Valtrex or Famvir, that risk could drop by another 50 percent. Wrong Move Making hasty assumptions about her past. Usually, it's jealousy—or worse, you're judging her, says Paul Hokemeyer, Ph. Dwelling on exes will only make you angry and insecure—and that kills relationships. Handle It Give your pal a courtesy heads-up, says Vinita Mehta PhD. Then be clear about what you want from her. Wrong Move Using it as ammo in the heat of a fight, says Hokemeyer. Making her feel guilty about a sexual choice is called slut-shaming, and it guarantees you'll have a lonely night. She's All Sass After the Third Glass THREAT LEVEL: 7 out of 10 Ask Yourself How often does Mrs. Frequent heavy drinking could reflect deeper issues, ones that may require professional help, says Marc F. Otherwise it's mostly a question of self-awareness and her willingness to adjust her ways, says Mehta. Consider This A bad drunk is more unpredictable than Joe Biden in front of a hot mike. And if relationships are fundamentally built on trust, Kern says, then you're building yours on an insecure foundation. Handle It Time for some tough love. Schedule a sit-down—a sober one—and ask her to reset her limits, Kern suggests. Gently give examples of how she crossed the line. Wrong Move Expecting she'll change on her own. Hangovers aren't making her any wiser.

Do men cry for days after break-ups or do you pick yourself up and keep moving. So, how should one deal with a break-up. Consider This Responsible herpes is more common than you think, says Dr. What are the tell-tale signs one is carrying baggage. It seems counterintuitive to not want to rid ourselves of what has weighed us down for so long - but letting go is not easy. Instead, try to dig north into the matter. What should you do after a break- up, especially when the emotions are still raw. Unlike women who will probably go to their girlfriends and cry all night, we men end up suffering in silence. I immediately consciously or unconsciously put up an emotional wall so I will not pan the relationship baggage cartoon impact. But how has he dealt with relationship loss in the past. I encourage you to put some thought into what triggers you emotionally.